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Self improvement journey

Hi everyone.

I will share with you a part of me, my humble ongoing journey to self-development.

Looking back after I graduated from college and pass the board exam, I have a more great time for myself, watching movies, spending more time with friends and family. It was a joyful time I have.

One of those days as I organised my old things in my cabinet, I saw a letter from my friends in high school. As I reread that letter i reflected on my old self in those days.  I've seen myself very different way back then. A shy child, insecure, fearful, negative thinker but I also consider myself religious, happy and having strong determination. Realized that I'm a product of my environment and the people around me. Without knowing it, it came to be my reality.

All experiences in college and the people that I bond with have different mindsets and perspectives. Give me insight into my views on life. It was also the time where I discover myself that the environment and attitude of those around me were reflected on me. As I realized where I came from, understanding the past, my parents, my siblings, bad and good experiences as a child. Accepting them give me peace in my heart, they are just also human who has also experience situation that produces unwanted consequences to those people around them. That realization opens my heart to wholeheartedly love them. It also gives me the sense of feeling to take control of my life. It is where I found in me wanting to improve as a better version of myself by knowing, understanding, accepting in the past, living and enjoying the present moment, planning and working to see the future and achieve my goal.

I bought a notebook and on December 17, 2018, I decided and committed to taking the path of self-development/self-improvement lifetime journey.
I observed myself as an overthinker, worrier, self-doubt as a person. But when I get my journal, sit at a table with a cup of tea and start to write my thought it opens my conscious thoughts, unconscious belief and biases. It gives me a clearer picture of my situation, behaviour, triggers, consequences and rewards. Learning where they came from gives me peace and power to seek a solution by reading the bible, inspirational books or videos to feed my self-talk as a realistic, practical positive approach.



 It is not magic that within seconds it will change but it takes a lot of prayers day by day, courage to act and work to continue to win the silent battle in me, see and recognized growth.



Now it has been 2 years and I've seen myself improve way back. My self-talk is a more realistic, truthful and positive approach and seeing the world with much hope for the future. It is joyful seeing positive changes in my mindset, behaviour and those people around me. Do I still have negative thoughts and behaviour? Yes, I say but was lessen compare before. I'm in progress meaning it is a journey to learn and grow as a person, there is always room for improvement. This journey is a lifetime where I enjoy every moment to live life to the fullest.

Sharing this with you makes my heart joyful. It is evidence that I conquered my fear of exposure and focus on what I can give to you, giving the best I have so that I can contribute light, hope to your heart.           



"Take each day One step at a time"

Remember ... there is a deeper strength and an amazing abundance of peace available to you.
Draw from this well;
Call on your faith to uphold you.
You will make it through this time and find joy in life again.
Life continues around us, even when our troubles seem to stop time.
There is good in life every day.
Take a few minutes to distract yourself from your concerns long enough to draw strength from a tree or to find pleasure in birds song
Return a smile, realize that life is a series of level 
The cycle of ups and downs, some easy, some challenging
Through it all, we learn, we grow strong in faith, we mature in understanding
The difficult time is often the best teachers, and there is good to be found in all situations 
Reach for the good
Be strong and don't give up
- Palma Owen Renfro


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